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Donkey laughter isn't polite

I read an article titled "I beg your pardon" in the newspaper today about manners.  The columnist, Henry Alford, is trying an approach he calls reverse etiquette where he apologizes when it really isn't his fault, but the person who should be saying, "I'm sorry" fails to do so.  He is concerned because the offending individuals still don't seem to get it and just accept his apology.  Maybe manners just aren't as big a deal as they used to be.

Manners need to be taught, but they aren't included in the NCLB law, so maybe there just isn't time for this anymore.  Plus, good manners start at home, and parents have to be consistent with their expectations.  This isn't always easy in today's busy world. 

What I'm getting at here is that teachers should be reinforcing good manners, not introducing them for the first time.  It's so important for kids to learn respect before they come to school.  If they are allowed to talk back and set the rules at home, it's a pretty good indication they are going to push for control at school. 

Then there is the problem of kids watching others show disrespect and getting by with it.  A lot of television sitcoms are based on kids being rude to others, and the laugh tracks go crazy at the end of each rude comment.  I sometimes find the laugh tracks so annoying that I can't stand the shows.  Is it just me, or are they getting louder?  Plus, the laughter sounds fake.  It's like a jar is being opened and closed with obnoxious, donkey laughter exploding out each time it is opened.

Maybe there should be a class on manners that kids have the pleasure of attending if their behavior is inappropriate at school.  It could be held on Saturday morning or after school.  Instead of just sitting and doing work, they could role play and be placed in scenarios where they can choose to use good manners.  This includes not laughing at others when they make bad choices. 

Posted: Saturday, November 22, 2008 10:27 AM by Betty
Comments

Melissa B. said:

I'm all for having Miss Manners come back to the classroom to teach the little buggers a thing or 2. I often ask my high school cherubs if their parents would be mortified if they knew how their little darlings behaved in school. BTW, my Silly Sunday Sweepstakes features a pretty highLARious snap tomorrow. Please come by and Share the Caption Love!

# November 22, 2008 12:10 PM

Kelli said:

I could not agree more Betty! As a student teacher, I am amazed at the lack of manners in the classrooms I work in. This has made me value my own upbringing even more. I do believe that it will by my job next year to hopefully reinforce manners, as you said, and not introduce them! But I also plan to set high "manner expectations" for my students. Manners will be modeled and valued in my classroom. Manners are important to me, and I would love to make them important to my students as well...

# November 25, 2008 12:59 AM

dkzody said:

I spend a lot of time teaching manners, both table and work.  The kids I have come some pretty rough homes and in most cases, there is no family dinner time.  Everyone does their own thing.  I teach them how to sit, put a napkin on their lap, and how to use all the silverware correctly.  We discuss topics you can discuss at the table and what to do if served something you don't like.  Yuck is not the correct response.

I have to teach things like writing a thank you note, shaking hands, saying excuse me, and even the simple please and thank you.  I wonder what parents are doing.

dz

# November 30, 2008 9:45 AM

Priya said:

Hi,

This is a nice article on children manners & behaviours. I agree with you that the manners needs to be started from home. But how many parents have the time to spend with their children in a day. Iam sure it might be hardly for 3-4 hours. So teaching them the right things at the right time becomes difficult. So expectations towards the school becomes more but this does not stop the parents from teaching. Parents do teach them with the time avaliable its only a little more that is expected from the teacher. Iam sure that there are many teachers who find pleasure in teaching children and i have seen them going beyond there way to make things better for the children.

# December 3, 2008 5:58 AM

Dr. Davis said:

Manners are part of a culture which is passing away.  The higher up in socioeconomic status you go, though, the more the manners continue to be practiced (at least in theory).  I think that teaching students appropriate manners is a good idea, especially if they are from a cultural group in which manners are not expected.  It will help them advance in ways that math and English proficiency, though also necessary, will not.

I could see several ways to do this in the classroom.  But it won't be real to them until they need it, so there is no telling whether they would absorb the lesson.  Perhaps years afterwards they will remember us and bless our teaching.

# December 7, 2008 12:51 PM
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